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In Psalm 8 , David asks of God, 'Who am I that You are mindful of me?' If you see me and I look puzzled, it's because this same question often keeps me distracted...

Friday, October 19, 2007 |


We're in N.Y. this weekend for Ellen and Peter's wedding. Steph is off doing 'bridesmaid duty' -- which consists of getting her nails done and going out to lunch.
In the meantime, I'm hanging out at Panera.

For possibly the first time in like a year, I have my Bible, a Jonathon Edwards book, good coffee, free internet, and 3 hours with nothing to do.

I do believe this post will get filed under 'worship'.

Today is a good day :0)

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The Gift of Worship Thursday, October 11, 2007 |

There's a great discussion going on over at the 'Shlog' about worship.

People are basically arguing about the question, "What is worship?"

This video from Sermon Spice takes a good stab at it:

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Can you love Jesus but not His bride? Wednesday, October 10, 2007 |

I was bored and looking around on facebook just now, a I read this in someone's profile:

I've been a Christian for 9 years. Went to church for about 8 of those years and then realized that God was calling us to something different - something out of the box. We have a small home group that meets at our house now and I don't think we will ever attend an actual modern day church again - Love Jesus just don't love what church has become.

I know this person. I know that she loves Jesus. I don't want to judge her heart or her motives. I just want to ask the question in the title of this post.

What do you think?

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Best eternal investment opps Tuesday, October 09, 2007 |

This weekend at church, I taught about how we are free to serve Jesus because we don't have to.


...yeah, just take a second and think about that. My texts were Galatians 5 and 1 Peter 2.


I got on a social justice soap-box for just a minute.

According to Compassion International, 19 billion dollars a year could provide for the basic needs of all the poorest children in the world. To put that figure in perspective, this is about half of what Americans spend on dieting programs every year.

I told folks at the church about various opportunities to invest eternally, and this morning I began a list on the website.

What do you think should be on the list?

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"Pulling Back" from church Thursday, October 04, 2007 |


About 16 months ago, I began my relationship with Abundant Life Fellowship.
Though some would say that it was luck or chance that I even heard of the church, I know that it was God’s providence, and looking back to June of 2006, I see His fingerprints all over the time since then.

When I found out about Abundant Life and started spending time with Pastor Ted and hearing him talk about his heart and vision for the fellowship, I got really excited. Having been overseas for the previous year, I had a lot of new thoughts about what ‘church’ should be like. The thought of coming back to the tradition heavy, religious ‘south’, and leaving the small, Acts 2-esque experience of a third world was discouraging to me. After spending some time with the folks from Abundant Life, I was truly blown away by the uniqueness and effectiveness of the whole experience. This is a fellowship that is personal, committed, involved, vulnerable, and free in many ways that other groups are not.

After enduring four years of high school in Oxford without a good church home, and praying the whole time that God would raise up a good church where I could grow and see lives changed, it was amazing to have the opportunity to be involved with the very answer to that prayer.

I dove in head-first. I had lists of all the stuff I wanted to do and to plan. I started listening to a lot of teaching about church planting and youth ministry. I began spending my Tuesday nights getting ready to teach the youth on Wednesday. I got to church an hour early on Wednesday nights so that some of the youth could come learn how to play instruments, and even though it was off in the distance, I saw the possibility to have an awesome worship team of teenagers who could bless people all over Granville county. It was a really fun and exciting kick-start back into ministry after being overseas and away from everything for a year.

So of course the question is, “What changed?”

The answer is, “Everything.”

Though I didn’t know it from the beginning, this season of time with Abundant Life was only a temporary learning experience for me. From the very beginning, God has lead me away from settling in at this stage of life. Once I began serving the church, I prayed and prayed for a job that would be compatible -- something near the church that was only part-time. Weeks went by and I got deeper in debt, and the only opportunities were full-time positions far away. So I bit the bullet and took a job in Durham -- 50 hours less to work with.

My family situation got more intense. I came home to a world of changes in my family, and lots of opportunity to serve them, given that I make time for it.

Then God gave me Stephanie, and soon I had very little time to invest in the church.
Even with all the commitments and changes, I tried to force the time to do everything I wanted with the church. Even while courting my wife 200 miles away, I planned events and used our ‘date time’ to do ‘church stuff’.

Even after she had moved to Creedmoor and was living alone in an apartment, and trying to cooperate with her mom and plan a huge wedding, I was still busy and asked her to be busy with me.

Even after we were married and bought a house with grass that needed cutting and boxes that needed to be un-packed, I asked her to wait for me while I took the youth to camp.
‘Righteousness’ is the act of valuing1 rightly. My pride has led me to treat my church responsibilities unrighteously. I communicated to everyone around me that ‘my ministry’ is more important than anything else. I taught my wife that I love her and appreciate her, but she’ll have to take my word for it because I have these other important obligations. I watched my sister get married to someone who I couldn’t make the time to disciple.

On top of all this, we have really suffered for lack of fellowship our age. We rarely get to spend time with other young married couples, and it has really made our adjustment to married life stressful. Even when Stephanie asked me if we could start going to events at other churches to meet people, I asked her to ‘grin and bear it’ a little longer. I asked her to sacrifice her own walk with the Lord so that I could feel like something special.

So our decision to move on has been a long time coming, and it has nothing to do with Abundant Life. Really, more than anything, we need to be free from responsibility for a season so that we can give unlimited attention to our marriage -- to each other.

Through hard times of prayer together and apart, and even weeping at the high cost of this decision, we have learned a lot. In fact, I am certain that God planned this season in our life to teach us. In the past year and half I have become almost certain that I want to devote my life to building the Church -- in America and abroad, and I have also become confident that I’m not ready to that. I have a lot to learn. We have a lot to learn. And thanks to our time here at Abundant Life, we have a better understanding of what we have to learn.

They say that 80% of pastors don’t make it. I believe that God, in His grace, is forcing the brakes in our lives so that we will make it, in His time.

So we’re going to take a break. Take some trips. Get some rest. And then, prayerfully, we’re going to look at the possibility of me going to school for an extended season of learning.

We love the youth here. It has been a heart-breaking decision to step back from teaching them, and learning from them. And we hope that God will give us creative ways to stay involved in your lives...

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More on the 'emerging' discussion Monday, September 24, 2007 |

J.D. Greear writes about his experience at the convergent conference at Southeastern this past weekend.

I'd be jealous if he just got to go to the conference.... but he was a speaker and got to spent the weekend with Mark Driscoll, which makes me green with envy.

He notes some really interesting and important things about the 'emerging' issues in the Church:

At SEBTS he discussed, in full detail, the emerging church movement. His perspective is unusual in that he addresses thing from the inside, having started out this process aligned with all the variant streams of the emerging church. He identifies 3 streams now...

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Funny Driscoll Quote Wednesday, September 19, 2007 |

I've been listening to Mark Driscoll a fair bit lately. (I highly recommend that you subscribe to the podcast)

Today I was listening to a teaching about scripture -- where it comes from, how to approach it, etc.

Here's a rough quote:

I listened to several hours of 'christian' radio last week. I don' t do that very often because then I say things that I have to repent of.


He made me chuckle because I understand where he's coming from.

What do you think? Agree? Disagree?

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O Church, Arise Friday, September 14, 2007 |


You've probably never heard of Keith and Kristyn Getty.



But you've probably heard of the song "In Christ Alone", which they wrote and which has become famous all over the world...

Stephanie and I went to chapel at Southeastern yesterday (that's an entirely different blog post... I'll have to keep you in suspense for a while :0), and lead worshiper went on and on about the power and beauty of the hymn-like songs that the Gettys have written. He lead us in a song called "O Church, Arise". I was blown away. You could tell me that it was written 200 years ago by Charles Spurgeon and I wouldn't think twice. When I got back to work, I immediately downloaded it on iTunes, and listened to it about a dozen times while I worked.

The chapel speaker yesterday, Dr. Akin, got me really excited when he said that every great revival in history has been accompanied by powerful, theologically sound hymns (that's the word he used, though I guess 'songs' would be more fair). He also said that a new generation of worship music is on the rise...

I think he might be right. Check out this first verse from "O Church, Arise":

O church, arise and put your armor on;
Hear the call of Christ our captain;
For now the weak can say that they are strong
In the strength that God has given.
With shield of faith and belt of truth
We'll stand against the devil's lies;
An army bold whose battle cry is "Love!"
Reaching out to those in darkness.


I would post the rest, but I guess that would be illegal, so follow the links and see for yourself.

Aslan is on the move...

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Please Pray For Jack Tuesday, September 11, 2007 |

Hey folks,

I just received this email from a leader in our church. Please don't get distracted by how long it looks. It took me 2 minutes to read it.

Please stop and take 5 minutes to lift this guy up in prayer:

I sold land to someone names Jack Rafac. His wife is Delores. He’s lived a rough life, from abandonment as a baby, to carnivals, to Chicago Hell’s Angels, to prison, to homicide, to informant, now under Witness Protection Plan. He looks rough. He is rough. But he’s got a little boy’s heart in him. He just wants to be cared about and loved. I am the only person he trusts in this world, other than Delores. He’s quite poor, making a living in the junk-world business, with a little government assistance per month. He has never missed a payment.

Jack was recently diagnosed with some form of liver cancer. They gave him a few years. He was optimistic and was preparing a plan to take care of Delores. He collapsed today and is now in the emergency room at Mariah Parham. Beth and I had just invited them to come to our house this week to bathe and to eat lunch with us. We were going to buy them some new clothes. He had agreed to let me share the gospel with him for at least an hour without interrupting me. (He loves to talk….)

Please pray that he will live long enough for me to see him in the hospital. Pray that he will live long enough to make that trip to our home. Pray that salvation will over take him when I share with him. Pray for Delores, too.

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Are we all fundamentally good? Saturday, September 08, 2007 |

This is a letter to the editor of the N.C. State newspaper, the Technician, that I wrote several years ago when I was a student there. I'm posting it because I reference it in the post below, "So Far, Pt. 1", think of it as a footnote, except above instead of below. The discussions I've seen lately about being 'good' makes it particularly relevant these days. What prompted me to write this was an article by a student who basically made the argument, "Wasn't Jesus a liberal?" This is my response:

I am writing in response to Isaac Tripp’s article, “Liberals have morals, too”, from February 23, 2005. I think he makes an important point, and as someone who classifies himself as a conservative Christian and a supporter of our president, I agree with the majority of his argument. I applaud the way he stated his point and, for the most part, managed to avoid unnecessary, overstated remarks about those who don’t share his opinion.
I am not writing in defense of the ‘moral right’ or the Christian faith, but I do feel compelled to point out a miserably unfounded statement that he made that I feel reflects a common misconception about the teaching of the Bible and it’s subject, Jesus.
Mr. Tripp begins his article by presenting his working definition of liberalism as: "a political philosophy based on the belief in progress, the essential goodness of the human race, and the autonomy of the individual and standing for the protection of political and civil liberties." That’s fair enough, but then he asks a semi-rhetorical question, which is what I’m responding to, “After all, wasn't Jesus the ultimate liberal?”
Now, before you break out your iBook and start writing me an email, allow me to clarify: I don’t care about the word ‘liberal’. That fact that Mr. Tripp links Jesus to this word is not what bothers me. Nor am I claiming that ‘liberal’, as defined, is not something good. My problem is precisely this: Jesus, and the entire Bible for that matter, taught and continues to teach almost the exact opposite of ‘the belief in progress, the essential goodness of the human race, and the autonomy of the individual…’.
The fundamental teaching that true Christianity is founded on is that man is not essentially good. Quite to the contrary, in Jeremiah 17:9, it says, “The heart (of man) is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? And the prophet Isaiah declares in Isaiah 64:6, “We have all become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous deeds are like a polluted garment. We all fade like a leaf, and our iniquities, like the wind, take us away.” The entire book of Romans, particularly chapters 5-8, is an exposition of how it is absolutely impossible for man to be good in God’s eyes.
To those who would object that we are made in God’s image, I point you back to the garden of Eden. Up until the day that Adam and Eve dropped the ball for all humanity, the definition of ‘liberal’ above was fairly accurate. But since that day, it simply doesn’t work.
As Easter approaches next month, let us not forget that Jesus Christ came to earth and died the barbaric death He endured precisely because it was the only way we could ever be ‘good’. As the Apostle Paul explained it in Romans 5:18-19, “Therefore, as one trespass led to condemnation for all men, so one act of righteousness leads to justification and life for all men. For as by the one man's disobedience the many were made sinners, so by the one man's obedience the many will be made righteous.”
In closing, I offer a strong challenge from the bottom of my heart to the ‘moral right’ and particularly to the Christians on our campus: Liberals, non-Christians, homosexuals, and anybody else you want to throw into that pot are not good… And neither are you… And neither am I. There are two types of people in this world, those who have chosen to be forgiven, and those who haven’t. When the ‘moral right’, and (my own opinion here) Christians in general, are known more for what we are against and who we condemn, than what we believe and stand on, something is very wrong. I would venture to guess that this is sitting in print next to another response to Mr. Tripp from a well-meaning Christian that basically says, “We’re right, you’re wrong, and you don’t know what you’re talking about because you don’t know what the Bible says.” I can’t wait for the day when that energy and time goes into serving someone instead.

-Zack Riesland
Senior, Computer Science

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so far, pt. 1 |

*I usually don't have time to write anything very meaningful, and I want to force myself to, because I think it's a really healthy exercise, so this is part one of what I think will probably be a lengthy series of posts. The title is 'so far', because with every day I live, I see things just a little differently, and this is what I see, so far. I would LOVE to hear your feedback/thoughts! *end disclaimer

I’m not sure what my goal is writing this right now. It seems like I haven’t had time to even think insightfully in a long time, and I think that somehow, writing makes it easier.
...well, I suppose that’s not true. I’ve been thinking a lot lately. I think I just don’t have time to think all the way through anything. In fact, I’ve been wrestling with this suspicion that if I did think through this stuff to the logical end, my life would probably get turbulent... again

I’m happy to report that I feel very alive these days, also very human. I’m less happy to report the ‘human’ part. It’s a very bittersweet thing, being human. Lately I’ve been reading and hearing about this ‘Palagian heresy’. In short, there’s this dude from history who didn’t like Augustin’s prayer, “Lord, command what You will, but grant what You command.” He said that’s it’s an absurd prayer, because God puts in all of us the innate ability to accomplish anything that God commands from us. And he even goes a step further and says that that means that we all have some good in us. And that’s where the ‘heresy’ comes from. Many people today -even followers of Jesus - believe that humans, deep down, are good, or at least we have some good. I actually wrote an editorial in the NC State newspaper about this when I was in college. The Bible is clear that there is no good in us. None whatsoever.
But that’s all kind of a rabbit trail. My point in diverging is that as I get a little older, and hopefully just a little bit wiser, I’m learning that theology doesn’t meet reality as simply as we would like it to. I most truly believe that there is no good in any of us. And yet, to steal the imagery from Erwin McMannus, I have these cravings inside of me that honestly feel like there is some good in them. And I see them in other people too.
To be continued...

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Kristian Stanfill Thursday, August 09, 2007 |

Kristian Stanfill has been a lead worshipper at 722 for a long time. It's a general rule that whichever songs he uses during worship will eventually become favorites of mine. But occasionally he leads songs that I've never heard and can't seem to find anywhere... these are usually songs that he's written himself.

When I gave up on finding them on CDs anywhere, I just hijacked the audio from the web streams and wore them out. But now there's a new EP available, and I want to make sure you know about it. It's awesome!

Go to his myspace, listen to 'Beautiful Jesus' and 'Spring of Life', and then go search his name on iTunes and buy his new EP, called 'Hello'.


Do it now :0)

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PB&J Campaign Wednesday, July 25, 2007 |

What do you think: http://itotd.com/articles/642/the-pb&j-campaign/

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This is why I want to work at DG Wednesday, July 18, 2007 |

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Awesome Video From "Astronomy Picture/Video Of The Day" Monday, July 02, 2007 |

Hey boys and girls!

If you don't check out the 'Astronomy Picture of the Day' on a regular basis, you are missing out!

Check this out*: http://antwrp.gsfc.nasa.gov/apod/image/0707/pelicanzoom_alves.mov

*Be patient: It'll take a couple of minutes...

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If you don't read JDGreear.com, you probably should Friday, June 01, 2007 |

I am consistently challenged, equipped and encouraged by pastor J.D. Greear's blog. This post is particularly of interest to me, as someone passionate about the Church. He talks about sitting down with Bill Hybels.

A highlight:

"A church ought to be diverse IN EVERY WAY that its community is diverse if it is to properly be called an Acts 2 church."

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Why I Want To Be Like Chris Tomlin (on the road to being like Jesus... which is much better :0) Thursday, May 31, 2007 |

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"The Innkeeper", by John Piper Tuesday, May 08, 2007 |

This made me tear up...

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Great Article About Worship Thursday, April 26, 2007 |

I'm posting this on behalf of my friend Stephen, since he keeps his blog under a password :0(

He pointed to a great article from Christianity Today entitled, "It's All About Who, Jesus?"

This little blurb will let you know what you're in for:

When we're not affirming God for how well we're nurtured, our songs often congratulate ourselves on how well we respond to God's grace. Have you noticed how much we sing about how loud or passionately we sing? We talk a lot about what we're going to do—usually in the singular: I will worship, I will praise you, I will bow down, etc., etc. One beautiful and well-intentioned song even tells us that God thinks of "me above all."

As my professor friend says, "Begging your pardon: the only person who thinks of Me above all is Me."

If it's not in our singing, it's in our preaching. Whether it's contemporary meet-my-needs sermons or old-fashioned fire-and-brimstone, the focus seems to circle in the vicinity of getting our fine wide souls into heaven, and between now and then, into better circumstances here on earth. And yes, I may be overstating the case. But then again, am I?

Any thoughts?

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Harvest Crusade Coming in June Friday, April 20, 2007 |


Since the News and Observer is even talking about it, I thought I'd make sure that everyone knows that the Harvest Crusade is coming to Raleigh, June 22-24. Over the course of three nights, there will be music from Leeland, Third Day, Toby Mac, David Crowder Band, and others.

This is especially significant to me because Harvest Christian Church (in Riverside, Ca) is where I became a believer and went for almost 10 years. I even went to school there for a while. Greg Laurie is the pastor at Harvest and is a very gifted evangelist. I've been to probably 10 different crusades over the years and they are really awesome opportunity to expose a friend to the really simple Gospel Message. Let me know if you have any questions about the crusades!

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About the author

In Psalm 8 , David asks of God, 'Who am I that You are mindful of me?' If you see me and I look puzzled, it's because this same question often keeps me distracted...